Greatness!!!!

I highly doubt I am the only that thinks this but sandwiches are the greatest thing to ever grace this Earth. Thanks to sliced bread and cold cuts or wateva that fits in between those slices of bread we have the greatest meal in the history of meals. So easy and quick to make, so delicious to eat. I fucking LOVE sandwiches. I think it goes back to being a kid and going on school trips I would get my ham and cheese on a roll and a juice and I would be set. I damn sure knew that the paper bag was not going to hold me back from destroying that sandwich. Sorry just had to vent. Let me know what you think about sandwiches cuz as you can see I love em....I personally believe that sandwiches can end wars plain and simple fuck a dove and an olive branch and all that talk....sandwiches can make people friends. Bring sandwiches to Israel or Palestine (which ever you prefer) and let's see them settle everything.



Ham & Cheese On A Roll Please,
Drizzy the Delicatessen

Booty Pop!!!!

Aww man chicks are gonna be deceiving men until the end of humanity this is nonsense....Booty Pop panties really?!?!?!? Listen if you don't have a butt so what don't fake the funk with this piece of shit.....what's gonna happen when you abt to get it popping (no pun intended) are you gonna be like don't grab my ass cuz its only padding. Fuck that if you don't have a butt maybe you were not meant to have one so let your natural ass handle everything for you.....This is so stupid...peep dude when the chick walks by lmao that is every man in the world I swear....



Big Booty Hoes,
Drizzy Pop

Shit On My Mind...

First off sandwiches are the shit. Second today is a nice ass day, why the fuck is it only Thursday. I woke up this morning with those two things on my mind sandwiches and Thursday. Today starts my weekend always has going back to college going to Chucks (that's a bar for you non-Syracusians out there). Technically I am quite happy that the weekend is here but also pissed that there is one more day in the way. Whatever I'm used to it now. I think the first thing I'm going to do when I get home is eat a sandwich scratch my head and balls and watch Pineapple Express, because that movie makes my day. AppleBean followers what is on your mind and what are you going to do today?

Let us know we like to hear from you....


R.I.P. Patrick Swayze....

Peace,
Drizz

Another Warning...

There's not a day that passes where some crazy shit happens in my life....This afternoon I was on my way to lunch and while I'm crossing the street I feel a tap on my shoulder. As soon as I turn around I'm looking in the eyes of a Sapphire Encrusted Giraffe. His name was Gilbert and he was lost and needed to find his way to Madison Square Garden. Don't ask me why he was on his way there but he had to get there badly. His neck wasn't as long as most giraffe's but he was still a giraffe. Apparently him and Geoffry from Toy 'R Us fame is his younger brother. Small world isn't it.

Animal Watching,
Drizzy the Zookeeper

Warning!!!!

So I woke up this morning and checked under my cover to see a motherfucking raccoon sleeping on top of my feet. WTF?!?!? How the hell did a raccoon get to the hood and how the fuck did it get into my home. I proceeded to beat its ass with my bat signed by the GREAT Ken Griffey Jr. Yeah it has blood on it now but I'm still alive.

Let this go as a warning ladies and gents, lock up your doors and bolt your windows shut because you will not know what will enter your house during the night. Be careful out there, there is no telling if a baby kangaroo may sneak under your bed or a whale shark may invade your fish tank. Last week a three eyed deer was in front of my door asking for sugar. New York has officially become the Animal Kingdom.

This is the beginning.....
Andy the Ass

Don't You Hate...

Here's a list of things I hate:

1. Being broke. Living check to check isn't cool at all.
2. Boxes that say fragile on it. Makes me want to just drop the shit when I see it.
3. Season finales. They always end the show on some od shit.
4. Kaleidoscopes, don't ask why cuz I don't even know.
5. Al Sharpton, cuz he thinks he's the second coming of Jesus. Calm down homie.
6. Twilight is it really that good?
7. Vienna Sausages, them shits look disgusting.
8. Nicolas Cage. I think he's a shitty actor but that's just me. If you need proof go watch Wicker Man, but I'll warn you the shit sucks.
9. The state of North Dakota.
10. Telia Tequila.
11. Wisdom Teeth.
12. PICKLES!!! The most disgusting thing on the planet besides roaches that fly.
13. The number 73.
14. Awkward moments during fashion shows.

So that is a short list of mine. Let me know what you hate?

Hate, Hate, Hate,
Drizzles Hates Lists Too

Ummmm?

What's this chicks deal? I mean talk about catching an L... I'm still puzzled on what she was doing... Was she trying to fly out the bus? Maybe she thought she was a basketball? Or better yet maybe she's just a dumb fuck that wanted to make an ass out of herself... If that's the case then ding ding, we got a winner. I know for sure if I was on that bus I would be pumping the shit out of that thump she took.... dumb ass

Hola from Buenos Aires, Argentina

Wat up mudda suckkas no I'm not in South America but I am chilling like an ice cube in a cooler. No videos today and no debates just me typing away and saying hello how are ya and good bye. For some reason I've come up with a case of writers block not too sure how but I have so don't judge me. I myself think that I specialize in laughter and making ppl laugh so that is my aim of this post... So I'll start out with saying my name is really Fredrick the Third. See no one knew that cuz I have masked my identity. OK I can see I lost all ya a tad bit. I also have twelve sisters and brothers huge family I know but hey we're the tightest family you will ever meet. My youngest brother's name is Harvey and he has two children one 12 and the other 3, both boys. Weird I know seeing that he is my youngest brother and I am only 24. Simply nuts.... but I'll let you figure that one out. So yea I have tons of nieces and nephews too many if you ask me which means tons of birthdays and events to go to and shit...yay lots of fun. I think there is a month straight of parties and births I have to go thru I find it purely and absolutely bonkers but wateva.

Tomorrow is Labor day which means lets not work yipppeee. Sometimes I feel like Labor Day should be the one day of the year you work your hardest. That would be nuts thou. I would like for everyone to cook all the food in the world tomorrow just to finish this so called summer. I'm used to crazy heat and tanning (like I need the shit)....this summer was abt who could swim or not with all that fucking rain. Seriously I went through about 54 umbrellas just to survive.

OK this has all been a ridiculous moment I just went thru in my life straight babble. Yes ladies and gents I am random as fuck I know but that is what makes me, me...ya digg.....I love ya and I am off to bed so I can wake up and get some peppermint toothpaste and green tea floss. I'll Holla!!!!

Please Don't Forget to Get Your Pets Spayed & Neutered,
Drizz Barker

Grandma is brolic

SHIIIIIIIIIIIT..... someone tell her to add weights on it! Then she'd be a real G! 85 and you cant do at least your age? Come on lady step it up...

Boredness

So I woke up this morning and went to work and realized that it is fucking Friday the 14th...You know wats so special abt today nothing at all....The reason I bring it up is cuz I can do whatever I want and say whatever I want.....there really is no point to this post right here I just feel like typing because I'm fucking bored and wat not....so I'm going to google google and see what I can find out abt it....

I'm going to leave you with a list of amazing things:

-Dolphins because legend has it the ones from the Amazon are shape shifters and have been seen taking the shape of humans (true story go to the Museum of Sex if you don't believe me)
-Burgers...I love em
-Music
-Blastoise nice ass Pokemon
-Aerodynamics
-Cups made of gold
-Japanese ppl
-Peter Pan and the Lost Boys
-Sweet & Sour Sauce
-Shorts
-Water laced with X
-Who Framed Roger Rabbit on VHS
-Festivals
-Steak & Mash Potatoes
-The wigs judges used to wear
-Rocket Launchers
-Dancing babies
-Chicken Fingers
-Flying Elephants so what if it was in a movie
-Johnny Quest
-The Indian dude that rolled with Johnny Quest
-Family Guy
-Salt Water Taffy
-Memory Eraser from MIB
-3-D glasses
-Bruce Willis

This list makes absolutely no sense but once again fuck you and I don't really care...

Bored,
Random Drizzles

Day Of Rest

Happy Sunday fuckers....the kid just got back from getting his fresh on and thought that Sunday is supposed to be the day of rest but in all reality there is no resting here at AppleBeans....we must continue to go in as we usually do ya dig....I have to step my game up I know it cuz I've been slacking on my macking slipping on my pimping....I will continue to provide post that you can notice me by its that simple....so from this day forward I will make sure to go in like a nail in the wall. So with that being said HAPPY SUNDAY MOTHERFUCKAAAASSSS!!!!!



Love,
Drizzles Esq.
AppleBeans Inc.
CFO

Fuck is good with this dog?

I dont even know where to begin.... I guess my first question is whats this dogs beef with Obama? Did he pass on him at the pound? How the fuck do you even train a dog to not eat treats? Thats like a fat kid passing on a cheeseburger, shit just dont happen.

Wish I could do this at work..

Hmmmmm some recession... niggas struggling to find jobs while these dinks are trying to break world records.... useless ones at that.... once again, people never fail to amaze me. But can I really hate? I mean im sitting here talking like I wouldnt do some shit like that either....

Is this dude ok?

I mean what the fuck? Did he not watch the video? Does he not realize he has a girl shitting in a cup with a girl prepared to eat it as a tattoo? We are talking about poopoo here, #2, diarreah, SHIT.... and this clown burger has a tattoo of arguably the nastiest thing to hit the .com world? Yeah, let me go get a tattoo of R.Kelly pissing on a girl, that should be hot right? Fuckin people man, never disappoint me...

Stank ass? Use Aspray!

Well why the fuck didnt I think of this? All these years of spraying febreeze and glad after ripping ass I couldve just whipped out my aspray! I mean what the fuck does this shit smell like? What differentiates this from febreeze? axe? any of them shits? and what a fuckin commercial, since when do guys lock lips with another guys ass (7 sec mark)? The way this guy pumps it its like you dont even have to shower anymore, why bother when you can spray your private parts with aspray. Well America, now that we have found the cure for stank I think its safe to sit next to that fatass on the train and not have to worry about your nostrils rotting.... HURRAY for Aspray!

Happy Monday

Well once again it is the worst day of the week....yea we're on the same wavelength, Monday. Why the fuck is Monday so bad no matter what its just a horrible day. I hope my kids aren't born on a Monday...it's ridiculous how bad this day sucks...whatever I guess we need it to get to Saturday right? Well fuck it gotta roll with the punches and fly in the wind towards the top....I guess without Monday we wouldn't have another week of greatness called AppleBeans ahead of us would we...on that note let's get this week started on a good note and I hope all of you fuckers out there following along have a great week and make sure you stay tuned here at AppleBeans.

Love ya cruel world,
Drizzleton

Who misses homework????

HAHAHAHAAH not me!!!! Who misses studying for tests?? Writing paper??? Group projects??? BOOOOFF that shit! Ill tell you what, thats one thing about college that I will never EVER miss! Looking back on what I couldve done with the time i spent studying compared to what I do now after work.. ha you can go fuck yourself education. So big ups to those of you who went above and beyond into grad school... idk how the fuck you dont want to commit that right now but im sure itll pay off at the end of the day... just not my day sucka

Freeballin Friday... Part II

I wont front, Fridays give me wood (unless i have to work sat then im softer then a babys ass). Nothing feels better then falling back from work knowing that you can sleep od the next day. So everyone go out tonight smoke a blunt, drink a drank, lick a cock if your into that shit and tell your mothers sisters daughter about the blog... shit tell her to tell her friends cousin... and he can tell his teacher...

au revoir

FreeEee BallIinnn!!!!

Now I know today aint friday but its sure close enuff and I am celebrating by FREEE BALLLIN!!!!!! Actually I had to do laundry cuz I had no draws and decided to free balllll. Not that bad I must say my laundry has been done for hours now and I still don't want put any on! Juss thought i'd recommend it to all who have never tried it! *warning* Free ballin with jeans may cause chaffing and unbearable sweat itchy balls....

Ballin Out,
MaRvElOuS cOnTrOvErSy S.K.A. Ballz JoHnSon Dancer

Futbol

I dont care what anyone says.... soccer is a hot ass sport... its only downfall is that them niggas is SUPER UBER DUBER soft. Shit gets tighter then a virgins special spot. Dudes be bumping into each other and dropping like flies, and they wonder why soccer dont get that much respect over in the U.S.... well its because we go HARD, hence why football is #1. Dudes get elbowed in the chest and somehow their ankle is hurt? How did you manage that? I say this because im watchin this milan game and yo its just fuckin retarded how soft they are... pure example why europeans are soft like a cotton.. except for my nigga tikky takka king (C. Ronaldo)... he the truth